THE SIMPLE STATS THAT TORPEDO CELTIC INJURY TIME CONSPIRACY THEORY
- BY LIAM CARRIGAN
- 49 minutes ago
- 3 min read
I think it’s fair to say, few moments this season will match the utter jubilation that erupted inside Rugby Park and around the Celtic supporting world this past weekend as Julian Araujo’s 97th minute strike completed a 3-2 comeback win.
Few moments will match it, but I have to admit, the pain, the faux outrage and the delusional, conspiratorial paranoia from our dear friends across the Clyde in the days since has come pretty close!
Like most conspiracies, especially those built upon the misplaced notions of supremacy and entitlement emanating from Ibrox, the idea that Celtic are somehow being helped in terms of the amount of added on time we receive at the end of matches does not hold up.
In fact, like most right-wing conspiracy theories in the world today, in actuality, the opposite applies.
A Little Fact-Checking Totally Destroys Celtic Injury Time Conspiracy Theory
Before I continue, I must give you all a timely reminder: Sevconian tears can be hazardous to your health, so please drink responsibly!
Anyway, the prevailing theory, and one that plenty of their puppets in the mainstream media are trying to perpetuate, is that Rangers predetermined destiny to win the league this year is being threatened by those well-known enemies of all things staunch: referees, and their propensity for adding on too much time at the end of Celtic games.
Yes, it is laughable to the point that sarcasm is the only way I can really process it, but there are enough idiots out there who either choose to play along with this nonsense, or in the case of the media, actively encourage it.
First of all, there is the obvious fact, casually ignored by those with an agenda. On Sunday, both Celtic and Kilmarnock had an extra 7 minutes (not 8 as some agenda-driven reports have claimed) to score a winner.
But let’s set that aside for a minute. It is true that some teams in the Scottish Premiership seem to get more time than others added on at the end of matches, especially when they aren’t already winning. However, I’m sure the denizens of Ibrox and their tabloid cheerleaders will be surprised at the results.
The highest average duration for a game involving a specific team this season in the Scottish top flight is Livingston, the current heavy favorites for relegation. Livingston’s games this season last an average of 95 minutes and 7 seconds. Celtic have only the 5th longest average duration in the league, with each Celtic game lasting an average of 94 minutes and 4 seconds.
In a position that most of their fans have become accustomed to in recent years, Rangers lie 2nd overall. The average match duration involving the current occupiers of the stadium John Brown played for sits at 94 minutes and 58 seconds.
Ah, but wait a minute, I can hear the cries from that team that loves to surrender: “What about games where it matters?
“We all know that Celtic get extra time added when they need a goal. Don’t they?”
Once again, as I’m sure many of them were often told during their school days: “sorry Billy, that’s the wrong answer!”
When it comes to the average amount of injury time added this season whilst chasing a win or a draw, Celtic do, admittedly rank quite high up the Scottish Premiership table, in 2nd place with an average of 5 minutes exactly.
Second to one team only, with an average of 5 minutes and 27 seconds, can you guess their name?
I’ll give you a hint: It started with R and it ended with... liquidation!
The Celtic injury time conspiracy is, much like Rangers, dead on arrival.